How to Get Good At Game in 1000 Words
Let's start by breaking success with women down to first principles. In other words, before adding in any speculation, what is fundamental?
There are two things:
1. Access - How much face time are you getting with the kinds of girls you're really attracted to, and in what context?
2. Attractiveness - If you do spend a few hours around an attractive girl, how likely is she to be interested?
Everything you think about doing in dating should be understood in these terms. For example, why would you pay $60 to get into a top Vegas nigthclub? Simple: access to really hot girls. Or why would you do cold approach pickup at all? Same reason: a chance to talk to girls who you wouldn't otherwise get the chance to spend time with. Why would you work out, or practice game or work through your insecurities? Again, simple: to be more attractive.
It's really as simple as this: when you think about how you're going to succeed at dating, you really just need to think about how you're going to optimally balance these two things.
Although the two play off each other (being attractive can make access easier, and vice versa), access is often the first problem for most guys because it's what you need to actually get better.
So building on that idea, the first thing you need is access, and by that I mean access in the simplest sense: you need to be getting a lot of face time with girls in a non-platonic context
. You need to figure out a way to do this so that you have a chance to actually learn how game and dating and pulling works. Until you create the kind of access, you have no way to improve. It's like trying to improve at basketball before you have access to a ball or a hoop.
Cold approach pickup is good because it takes away a ton of barriers: you can approach virtually anyone. But you MUST be getting time in set. If you're just starting out or coming back after a long hiatus, you may need to go through a short phase of just getting used to approaching, but that shouldn't last long. What you're looking for is FACE TIME. You MUST find some way to get it
. If you're consistently having trouble just lasting a minute or two in night game, you need to change things up, lower the bar or try something else. Do whatever you need to do.
Online or day game are other good options. Lower the bar. Start with anyone who will stay and talk with you, even if you're not into them. You simply must get face time if you want a chance to improve.
If you can find an easier way to get non-platonic face time with girls, by all mean do so.
Use the face-time metric to gauge whether you're actually giving yourself a realistic chance at getting good at this. If you're going out for 4 hours and approaching, but only spending a total of 10 minutes in set, you're not going anywhere fast. Be honest with yourself. You may need dozens or even hundreds of hours of actual face time to figure this out. If you're only spending 20 minutes a week actually standing in front of a girl and hitting on her, it's going to take a long, long time and you'll probably get fed up before you ever get good at this.
Once you're getting face time with girls in a dating-oriented context, the next step is simply to rack up experience and start working your way up.
The problem most guys run into here is that they try to skip steps. The first step at any level is always face time. If you try to emphasize getting a girl to want to fuck you before you can get her to stand there and talk to you for 5 minutes, you're going to have a really hard time and really slow progress. Even as you move up to the hottest girls, the same rule applies: you must emphasize getting face time first.
Now, once you're consistently getting this kind of face time, you simply need to learn how to turn that into attraction, escalation and sex.This isn't a mystical or magical process. You simply try stuff until you figure out what works and what doesn't.
Some stuff you try will blow you out, and with other stuff you'll notice her getting more attracted. Just keep doing this until you find yourself doing more and more of the stuff that makes her laugh, give you all of her attention, stay with you longer and start to like you. 99% of "game" is simply doing this enough that you get really good at it.
For many guys, this is literally all they need to do. Paying attention to fashion, nutrition and fitness will speed up the process, mostly because it gets you more face time and lowers the bar for how attractive your personality has to be. Don't complain about shortcomings. No matter who you are, someone will talk to you and you can work on developing a more attractive personality.
You really only need to worry about inner game when your mind is protesting too much and not letting you go through the above process. Can't approach? Lower the bar for success and take it easier on yourself. Not willing to lower the bar and start with less attractive girls in easier situations? Work on getting over your ego. Getting in your head and acting needy around more attractive girls? Work through your fears and insecurities.
If some progress isn't obvious after a few months, and extremely clear after a year or two, you're probably not following the advice above.
It really is that simple.
You just have to do it. http://www.rsdnation.com/node/878937