En gammel klassisk PolarCat post:
I've been doing a lot of approaches in shops, food stores etc.
I call these places "Lock-in-places" because the people are locked in. They are currently in one place and they are not leaving. This is a bit different from in the street since people are moving quickly away.
Logistical properties of Lock-in-places:
- There is much to talk about in the place. If you are in a food shop you can comment about the food, ask for tips for cooking
- Targets generally don't leave quickly since they are looking for something
- People will hear you easier so if you want to get attention by noise this is easy. Talk loud, in phones or with the store people and make sure to only say things you want to convey. Like how much fun you had on the beach, that cool girl you met etc. Phones can be used to get attention
- Room gaming is easier since others will notice you and hear you if you are in other sets.
- Warm up sets. If you feel AA you can warm up with the store girls, and don't forget that you can always game them too...
- Most people are quite bored in stores and they would love for a mysterious stranger to approach them and give some excitement in their lives. That is right that is .... YOU
To make openings natural it's important to
- position yourself correctly so you are close to each other "by chance". You just happen to be looking at these yellow flowers. When you move up to the flower you can show a bit of uninterested body language first then you look over at her and make a comment about them.
- Be in a situation where you have something common. It can be something as small as you are both looking at flowers in a shop. Then just make a comment about the flowers. It's almost as if you are talking to yourself. Remember to quickly move into another routine after that.
- Be smooth and completely relaxed inside. You are at the beach and you just had this wonderful breakfast looking out at the sea. This is the emotions you want to send.
- If you feel AA warmup with the people working. Avoid talking things in the store, focus on other things. My standard opener is about their feelings of working. "So, how does it feel to be working on a sunny day like this?" with a big smile "Ahh, it's gotta be tough to work on weekends" Then you make fun of them that they have to work and you can go down to the beach and meet some friends. Then I usually talk about a wonderful breakfast i had, about drinking coffee, meeting friends, dancing or something that sounds interesting.
- Ask their numbers. This can feel hard, but do it as much as you can. Do it in all occasions if possible, remember you don't have to talk for long to get a number. You can even open by asking for their number.
- Do small venue changes inside the store. Get her to move to something else. "Have you seen these weird knives?"
- Notice body language. Some are easier to open than others. I normally don't approach girls who look very busy or pissed of. The ones that are easy to approach are lingering in one area and don't have a clear plan on where to go.
- Be loud if you are with friends. Being loud is very powerful to getting peoples attention.
- You can either be smooth and very relaxed with your voice when you open or you can be firm "hey! Do you know what the best ...."
- Cool clothing. If you have cool different clothing people will naturally assume that you are interesting. This makes opening easier since you have less to prove.
Some openers I use:
"Anything fun going on here?" Then bust them if they say no, if they say yes I sometimes bust them that it doesn't look like that much fun. Then go into something else.
"Do you guys find anything fun?" Then something like "man, this is a really weird candle". they are not open yet so you need to move into something else, perhaps a story about something cool you found and then a question "Last night I was out with some friends in Copenhagen and we found this really cool shop with old design clothing" It was really cool they had these African details and bla...." question:"Do you like different cultures/music/art" etc. This lets her qualify to you. Very powerful stuff.
"This x is pretty weird. Would you have something like this at home?"
"I need a female opinion on something. It's my friends birthday and ..."
After you opened and talked to them a bit there are a few things to do:
Hyping and insta date
- You can hype something that you want to do. For example take a coffee, eat breakfast in your garden etc. Qualify her by asking can you cook/do you like music/etc. Then say cool and then bring her to the place you hyped. "I'm getting some breakfast, it will be fun. Come one"
- Qualify her, validate her and then ask for #.
Go out and practice. They will love you